Reviewed: Crysis 2

New York City gets the shit beaten out of it roughly every 18 months of average.  If it's not a catastrophic environmental event (tsunami, asteroid, earthquake) it's something else entirely (population-killing virus, Godzilla, that thing from Cloverfield, the 8th season of "24.").  You'd think by now, people would ease up on the old gray bitch, but no, EA and Crytek dusted the old punching bag off for another round with "Crysis 2."

There are a lot of great aspects of "Crysis 2 (C2 from here on in... one thing that's NOT great about the game is it's name... which never really gets explained.... maybe they say something in "Crysis 1" but I dunno... never played it.)" one of which, as just parenthetically mentioned, is you don't need to really know what happened in the first game to enjoy the full aspects of the sequel.  The game starts off with a long cut scene, a submarine, US Marines getting blown to hell, and a "super soldier" wearing a biologically-enhanced "nano-suit."  There's something about an alien invasion in the middle of Manhattan that looks like it borrowed heavily from the "Halo" franchise, and you soon take control over the nano-suit and go on a merry gun-blasting time throughout NYC.

Or do you?  The suit comes in three interchangeable flavors to "suit" your needs at any given time.  You can go "stealth mode" which is akin to what the Predator does before he swoops in a kills a former Governor, an "armor" mode which essentially allows you to "tank" around a level, taking and dolling out tons of damage, and a "power" mode which is more or less sentient, as you use it's "powers" at all times, whether you're jumping extra high to grab a ledge, sliding for cover, heaving heavy objects or doors open, etc.

But these powers come at a price.  You have an energy meter that will deplete based around your usage of a given commodity, ie, you can only stay "cloaked" or armored for so long (not very long at all, actually) and you can only sprint, run, slide for so long as well.  This feature is a nice "budgeting" aspect that goes beyond ammunition and explosives consumption you don't seen in many First Person Shooters.

Plot-wise, the game is long but too spread out.  The campaign mission runs a deep ten or so hours (unheard of in the modern FPS, with most shooters clocking in around the 6-8 hour mark).  Half-way thru the single-player I was shocked to learn that the game wasn't in it's closing stages, that I still had four or five more levels to play.

However, I cared little about the characters, as they all seemed one-dimensional and interchangeable.  A scientist, corporate billionaire, military contractor, military members and a secret agent round out the cast you interact with the most.  Again, nothing too crazy here, as I played the game mostly with the sound down.  I couldn't hear the dialog, and I didn't really care.

Given that the use of the suit's "powers" are what drive the game play, the developers silently urged players not to just run and gun thru the levels (quick side note: the levels do seem a bit linearly-designed; any jaunt down a side street will bring you face to face with rubble and debris making it impossible for exploration.  Kind of a let down for the game being set in such a fantastic locale), but instead to observe and plan out a tactical approach.  Usually, from a high ledge overlooking a plaza, you'll be prompted to switch to a "tactical" view and mark objectives and enemies before engaging.  By doing so, your marksmanship is greatly improved, as are your chances of survival.  As I found out more than once, dropping in without first assessing the given situation is typically folly.

Visually, the game is stunning, fast out-pacing anything that's currently available for FPSs.  The animation, set design and frame rates are all top notch.  The use of rich colors and graphics really stand out, and I only experienced a few glitches during the campaign pertaining to environments not displaying in time for my character or enemy NPCs walking thru walls.  Given the length of the campaign and the sheer beauty of the game itself, I can let these small instances slide.

However, there are more, detrimental glitches that should be noted: the enemy NPCs are suffering in the AI department.  Crytek made big promises regarding how advanced the enemy AI would be when the game rolled out.  I was disappointed to find that the enemy NPCs were essentially mindless zombies that would roll out in waves.  Yes, they'd take cover, retreat, advance and flank, but so do the enemy NPC in just about any FPS game made since 2007.  Often times I would simply cloak, move to the left or right, wait a few moments, and then slide in behind for a "stealth kill."

Also, I found that in later levels, enemy NPCs would be stuck in a "wall walk" that is, walking forever into a piece of scenery at the edge of a map, unable to navigate around it.

So-called "boss battles" were challenging however, as you experience your first major boss, a multi-legged, spider-looking tank turret called a "pinger" roughly a third the way thru the campaign.  The objective is to out-flank the pinger and attack it's rear, however, the bluddy thing can see you even when your under your cloak, making flanking nearly impossible.  You'll fight three of these monsters throughout the campaign, but strangely enough, not at the end.

No, the final "boss battle" involves your character systematically taking out four cloaked "cephs (the derogatory name of the enemy alien.  It made me think of the "Prawns" from "District 9")" of more elite training.  I found that if I simply stayed back far enough with a sniper rifle and explosives, these were of little threat to me.  As I stated above, the lack of intelligence shown by the NPCs, made picking them apart very little of a challenge.

As for the multiplayer, I was glad to notice how there seemed to be more emphasis on the single-player experience from the developers, especially in a day-and-age when the focus for developers and gamers is the online play.  Game types in C2's multiplayer are akin to any you'd find in any modern FPS, including Team Deathmatch, Free-for-All, Capture the Flag (called something different here) and a Domination-type game. 

What makes Crytek's take on FPS multiplayer is the level of customization one can play with.  For beyond just outfitting your customized character with a loadout of various weapons and equipment, the game will skew towards your style of play.  If you like to stay cloaked, you'll earn more "stealth" points than "power" or "armor" and vice versa.  These points can be spent on upgrades that are class specific (meaning, you can't use points you earned via stealth on armor upgrades, etc).  While there's an assortment of weapons and equipment that can be unlocked as you progress in level, the real treat is fine-tuning your character by how you play the game.

Altho, with the cloaking ability, I'm finding the Team Deathmatch and Free-for-All matches to be camper-friendly, as more players are inclined to hide in corners of the maps and snipe or wait for players to run by before shotgunning them to death from underneath their cloaks.

The maps come in two sizes, I'm finding: big and small, or what might be more accurate, too big and just right.  Maps like Pier 17, Skyline and Statue are really too big, with too much shit in the way to be fun playing a TDM or FFA match.  As you sprint out to battle, you'll likely be cut down by a well placed sniper across the map.  This rings familiar with my experience playing EA's other shooter from last year "Medal of Honor."

The smaller maps are just the right size, and both types offer multiple levels of engagements, from underwater to roof tops, the set design is very true to the campaign aspect of the game but not cookie-cutter, unlike other shooters where multiplayer maps are essentially just crudely cut chunks of actual levels you just played in (looking at you, COD.).

All in all, C2 is a breath of fresh air after spending 6 months grinding away at COD: Black Ops.  While there's an occasional sour note, "Crysis 2" is certainly an opus that makes up for EA's recent under-performing FPS offers.

Dispactch: The Biddeford Gun Show, Two Years Later

It had been about two years since I had been to the annual Biddeford Gun Show, and by the looks of things, I hadn't missed much.

Like two years ago, the show was smaller than I remembered, but unlike two years ago, the crowds that had shown up, packed-in in fear and panic, were absent too.  A quick survey by the front door told me everything I needed to know.

Where there was usually a line to get in, was gone.  I was able to walk up to the check-in desk with my Enfield Mark 3 rifle unobstructed.  A fat, old Vietnam vet with bad arthritis cleared my weapon and barely managed to slide a paper tag around the trigger guard to prove that it was a weapon I had come in with.  I wasn't necessarily looking to sell the gun, but if someone made me the right offer, who knows.

My father and I began our usual pattern of walking around the outside tables first before making our way into the interior.  The show is held in a converted ice arena where the local high school hockey team plays and practices.  With this much room, you'd expect there to be more vendors, more people, more to see, but you'd be wrong.

It's unclear if the economy is playing a role in any of this; I check the prices of a few guns I'm familiar with and am shocked to learn that the same .45 I bought about four years ago is now about $150 dollars more expensive.  The average cost at the show of a middle-of-the-road AR15s (the civilian-marketed version of the military's M4 carbine) is running between $750 and $1200, depending on what you want and who made it.

My expectations are always high, I tell my dad, but seldom are they ever met at the gun show.

We're surrounded by RealTree camo, LL Bean boots, beer guts, and the occasional cabal of amateurish gangster wannabes gawking over a nickle-plated junk pistol worth less than the Chinese-manufactured accessories it comes with.  In my black NorthFace spring jacket and J. Crew wardrobe I stand out like a narc.

I notice there's a few women milling about with their boyfriends or husbands.  They look bored; with every group of five or six guys standing over a table, two feet behind them are a group of women, talking amongst themselves, or absently pushing a baby stroller back and forth in a four-foot area. 

We reach what's considered the centerpiece table, the vendor with the show's most prestige and I'm not surprised when I see the wide-smiling coked-out jackass with his bluetooth earpiece stuck to the side of his face, placating the group of XXXL t-shirt wearing hooligans all finger-fucking cheap Tech-9 assault pistols.

This guy, the vendor, somehow manages to hold a Level-3 gun permit, the hardest and most sought-after gun license in the country.  With the Level-3 license, one can own just about any killing devices ever constructed, if he or she has the right amount of money.  Why I'm so surprised by this guy, is the fact he's a known cocaine addict.

A few years back, my father and I paid him a visit in his home/shop to look at suppressors for one of my pistols.  When I found out nothing he had fit the threading on my barrel, we made to leave.  But then, this guy asked my dad if he wanted to see something of his in the back room.  Reluctantly my dad said "sure."

A few seconds after disappearing, my dad comes out and says we're out of here.  Apparently, the guy had offered my dad some cocaine.

So, flash forward to now: this grinning idiot is holding court amongst slack-jawed locals, laughing and smiling at them.  He knows he's about to feed his habit ten fold today.

I look down at his collection and I'm not terribly impressed.  His table looks like a collection of a FARC weapons cache; machine pistols with extended magazines and suppressors, AK47s with folding stocks, machetes, knives, M16s with under-barrel attachments, like M203s (grenade launchers) and miniature shotguns. 

He has three show-quality pieces stacked in the middle of his table, surrounded by the rest of the junk.  He has a pile of magazines and bullets, knives and tac-lights, even t-shirts for sale.  I take this all in, with the thought that, the more "advanced" our modern military weaponry gets, the more medieval it looks: picatinny rails poke out from the sides and tops of gun barrels like spikes on a mace, elongated magazines and folding stocks look like crude black hilts of swords.

The jackass must see me eying the top-shelf hardware because he's left the gang of comedians to one of his sons.  The group is collectively growing louder, crasser, slapping and snapping the dry actions on the junk hardware while pointing them in just about any other direction than safe.

"Yeah, that's a real beaut," he starts in right over me.  I don't think he recognizes me (its been years) but I ask if it's ok to shoulder his Styer Aug.  He says sure, in a very friendly way and I pick up the bullpup rifle.

I point it towards the ceiling and sight down the barrel.  Front Post sights; my cheek presses into the rest molded over the mag housing.  I adjust my grip a little on the forward under-barrel vertical "sweeper" grip and squeeze the weapon into my shoulder a little tighter.  I've never fired one of these before.

"How's the recoil?"  I ask.  He gets a little excited.  The price tag flashes into my view from the trigger guard and it reads $3500.  I nearly laugh.

"Smooth, the rotary bolt action sits back here at the shoulder," and he points to where the action would be, and goes on to talk about what I already know about the gun.  I set it down.

"Shame I'm a lefty...." I lie.  The gun can only be fired from the right-hand side due to it's ejection port being at the shoulder stock.  His face drains as I set the rifle back down.  He turns his attention back to Biddeford's Finest, his tone not as jovial as before.

The rest of the show goes like this: dad's more into the older, wooden stuff, and the "purse pistols"; the small caliber, easily concealable guns that you'd find in a woman's purse.  I'm more into the quality military hardware, the black polymers, etc.

There's really not much for us to look at.

Sure, there's tables with the occasional exotic piece, and there's enough plastic guns to go around, but nothing of real quality.  As we pass by a table, I notice a lone AR15 on a rack.  I ask to pick it up and shoulder it and the guy has no problem letting me do exactly that.

It's a good fit and the price is right.  I tell him it's the most honestly-priced weapon at the show and he takes it as a compliment.  He says that it looks like I know how to handle one, and I tell him I do.

I give the rifle the once over as my dad holds my Enfield.  I ask if the weapon's been recently cleaned and the vendor says "of course, yes."  I ask if it's ok to check the insides of the gun?

He hesitates and eventually says it's ok.  With the flat of my palm I pop the assembly pin out of the rear of the receiver and let the upper swing forward exposing the rifle's guts.  I'm surprised when a cobweb-covered bat doesn't flap out of the chamber.

I pull back a little and blow down the barrel, causing a plume of black dust to come out.  I look back at the vendor and say something snide and he takes it in stride.  Still, it's an alright "Frankenstein" gun (it was built of different parts, non-factory) for what he's asking.  I tell him I'll think about it.  He tells me I should help "stimulate" the economy.

We take in only a few more tables.  A few older men take a mild interest in my Enfield but no one makes an offer.  There's a sort of unspoken rule about private sales at gun shows.  You only make an offer if you're serious, and no one wants to make an offer unless they know what you're asking.  A few people ask me what I want for it, and I tell them to make me an offer.  They balk.

It's a stupid dance.

We leave empty-handed (save, of course, my Enfield) and get lunch at the Wendy's across the street.  I realize then how flavorless the food is. 

Later, on our way back to Rochester, we pass the Outlaw Motorcycle Club's burnt-down clubhouse.  Apparently the clubhouse had mysteriously burned down after a massive nation-wide raid had snatched up a bunch of members (and killed at least one.). 

We flip off the gutted building.

US Gov't 101 (What the Pending Government Shut Down Means for You)

So, back in my gov class, the topic du jour was this impending impasse of our central government.  What pervaded amongst the majority of the ill- or non-informed members of the class, was this fear that if congress couldn't come to a deal with the federal budget, everything would come crumbling down around us as if we were Japan.

Well, let me be the one to assure you all, that, government will still be operational even after the 12:01am deadline on Saturday.  What's going to be "shut down" will be non-essential services.

I'll give you the rhetoric that was spewed in class and dispute it with facts:

1.  Government will be non-existent, and society will crumble into a regionalized hierarchy similar to any post-apocalyptic-style film made in the last 30 years.

False!  Government will still be operational, just not at 100% (See also: the Deathstar).  As I mentioned, essential services, such as federal law enforcement agencies (the FBI, DEA, US Marshals, etc) the military and other government agencies (such as the IRS) will still be open on Monday.  These services and agencies are vital to the every day operation of our country, and therefore cannot be shut off.


2.  The Post Office will be closed indefinitely!

False!  The United States Post Office is a self-sustainable, essential service to US citizens.  That being said, any agency that is self-sustaining (meaning, it costs people money to use it, ie, buying stamps, paying for postage...) is not subject to the government's shut down, if it should occur.


3.  We don't have to file our taxes!

False!  You do, in fact, have to file if you haven't done so already.  Using the excuse "the government was out of order when I tried to file" will be looked upon as "bullshit" by the IRS.  And remember too, the federal government's impending shut down does not directly effect state-run agencies, meaning, you'll still have to file your state (and city, where applicable... Looking at you, NYC) taxes.

However, if you're filing a paper return, you can expect a possible delay in getting your check.  It's being advised that those who normally file paper returns should look into filing electronically, because the electronic dispersal of funds is not going to be affected by the looming shut down, since no humans are involved in that end of things.  People who file electronically can expect to get their tax returns on time and in good order.


4.  Does this mean I won't get my social security check?

No, as with all electronically debited funds, no human is involved in the dispersal of that money.  If you get a government check every month, from say, social security or the VA, you should be in good hands, as those checks are set up to roll on the first (or whatever day) of each month, regardless of what congress does or doesn't do.

What WILL be affected by the (probable) federal government shut down will be what are considered "non-essential" positions.  These positions include staff at federal museums (think, the guy who checks coats at the National Archive or the Library of Congress), congressional support staff (cafeteria cooks on Capital Hill), and government researchers, tho it should be noted that any medical research trials that are currently underway will continue, but no new research projects will be allowed to start.

How this will affect the military: If you, or someone you know, is in the armed services, they'll still have a job.  Although, that they're getting paid to conduct that job is up in the air at this point.  If the shut down last at least a week, service members will see a 50% reduced pay check come April 29th (usually they get paid on the 1st of each month, but May 1st is on a Sunday this year, so it reverts to the Friday previous).  If the shut out lasts longer than a week, they won't receive a check again until the impasse is corrected or their next pay period, whichever comes first.

Why that sucks, aside from the obvious reasons, is because the bulk of our armed services are young people, usually with families, who are living literally paycheck to paycheck.  What compounds things is that a lot of service members are overseas and it's the families that are forced to deal with the short comings with the pay.  Granted, pay will be retroactive to the when the shut down started, but tell that to a 22 year old mom of 3 who hasn't seen her equally young husband in 6 months because he's in the middle of a war zone.

So, in the end, there's no real reason to panic, unless you're a non-essential government employee or a military service member.  On a personal note, I find it completely ridiculous that congress is so adversarial that they would sooner face a complete shut down of federal government than "show weakness" by conceding to the other party.

It's time to grow the fuck up, boys and girls.

War (as a Business Model)

Profiting from war is an age-old means of generating giant mountains of cash.  I'm talking Scrooge McDuck Money. .... Ben Franklin cedes his position on the 100 dollar bill to your visage.... you get the idea.

But what about studying a war as a business model?  As I was coming home with my wife from errands this afternoon, I posed this question, because it was randomly on my mind at that time:

"Would you consider the Army (or the military as a whole) and the Taliban to be co-workers?"

My wife didn't say anything for a minute.  Then she broke the silence with "where did that come from?"

I explained that my line of thinking was this:  both organizations are in the business of changing (by mostly force) the ideologies of a populace.  The Taliban will roam your neighborhood streets and beat you with a tire iron if you don't grow a beard (ladies too) whereas, if you don't think Democracy is the cat's balls, the US military will either send some black-clad men with machine guns to your hut in the middle of the night or just drop a two-ton bomb on you from a mile in the sky.

With this, my wife, smartly asserted that the US Military (henceforth "military") and the Taliban are competition in the same market, similar to Coca-Cola and Pepsi.  Both soft drink companies are trying to get their product into your home, and spend tons of money to do so, and while they operate in the same market, they do not "work together" towards their common goal.  The Military and the Taliban both want to change the hearts and minds of people... by putting their "product" in their homes, but the product is slightly different. Both Coke and Pepsi are similar products (soft drinks) as is the "product" of both opposing forces in the War on Terror; an ideology, oppose to a sugary soft drink.

As we rounded the last corner to come home, my wife quipped "talk about cut-throat business...." ...and that folks, is why I married her.